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Communications and Personality Type |
Introduction
Don't you often feel as if we exist in a sort of human bubble? I mean honestly, we are in some sense trapped within ourselves, left to ponder only our own thoughts, and experience only our own emotions. Understandably, we take in an amazing amount of outside sensory information. Did you realize that at any one moment in time we are experiencing 7 new sensory impressions? And by the time a whole second passes we have taken in 125 different sensory impressions. Our eyes alone take in 36,000 impressions every hour. Now obviously only about 1 percent of this sensory cyclone comes in to our conscious minds, which if you think about it, makes a great case for why we don't communicate very well. Our margins for misunderstanding are HUGE, with a capital HUGE! Our solution is perhaps to relate to those folks who are more like us. A bubble within a bigger bubble if you will (Note: This is just me trying to be a bit clever with a strained metaphor. I am certainly NOT calling anyone an "Air Head or a Bubble Brain").
There is, however, a certain safety in hanging around people who look, act, feel and think as we do. At least here we have a particular point of reference, even though some might say, a tiny bit flawed. But alas it is not uncommon for us to have to venture outside the bigger bubble, and meet someone who is in someway or another different from us. When we exercise a level of openness and acceptance we even stand a fairly good chance of communicating to them. Below is a great article from Pamela Hollister (pamhollister@thepeopleprocess.com) whose website www.thepeopleprocess.com, provides us great insight about who we are, and the way in which we communicate.
Communications and Personality Type – Extravert & Introvert
 © Copyright 2006 Pamela Hollister
Communication is central to our life—we communicate with others every day, throughout the day. Understanding, appreciating, and accommodating personality differences in communication style can bring major success to our effectiveness as a friend, spouse, employee, supervisor, trainer, leader, and team member. People have different preferences in the way they take in and evaluate information and their orientation to the world around them. As we develop our awareness, understanding, and appreciation of communication differences, we will reap the benefit in our relationship with others.
Extraverts are energized by lively and enthusiastic discussions, with rapid-paced conversation, and often interrupt as they elaborate on and process thoughts. Introverts are energized by quiet conversations with space for reflection and conversation pace is slower, taking time as they build thoughts and ideas internally. Extraverts' communication approach doesn't allow time for Introverts to reflect and then give their opinions. Extraverts like to "think out loud" and don't realize that Introverts feel unable to respond quickly in a conversation, preferring to internalize the information first. Thus, the Extraverts' reaction sometimes is that the Introvert is not providing input that energizes the Extravert.
When Introverts share information, it has been carefully thought through and evaluated. When an Extravert is in the "thinking out loud" mode they may not give the input the full evaluation it merits. Similarly, Introverts may put too much emphasis on what is said by Extraverts, not realizing they are "hearing themselves think" and need to process information this way. This can cause difficulties for both preferences as Extraverts may miss valuable contributions by Introverts, and Introverts may take what Extraverts say too seriously and make decisions based on the input.
These communication differences can be especially dangerous in conflict situations, as Extraverts want to handle a situation immediately and Introverts require time to think things through before giving their ideas on possible solutions. Because each preference is requiring something the other type does not prefer, tension can increase. Extraverts can become impatient, wanting to move forward and make a decision not giving time to the Introverts' need to process the information internally and, then, make a decision.
Extraverts in communication
Strengths:
- Energetic & enthusiastic
- Think out loud
- Give a lot of information
- Network well
Communication Approach:
- Speak out freely in groups
- Think out loud
- Like to discuss lots of topics
- Interrupt often during discussion
When Communicating with Extraverts:
- Listen attentively
- Be actively responsive
- Be energetic & enthusiastic
- Support their need to communicate
Introverts in communication
Strengths:
- Quiet, reflective presence
- Respond carefully and thoughtfully
- Know a few people well
- Listen without interrupting
Communication Approach:
- Listen more than talk
- Talk one on one
- Need time to reflect before responding
- Process information internally
When Communicating with Extraverts:
- Value their need for privacy
- Allow them time to change focus
- Ask questions to draw them out
- Don't pressure for an instant response
Pamela Hollister
Author, The PEOPLE Process
October 26, 2006
Resource Material: Introduction to Type & Communication, CPP Inc. & The PEOPLE Process The Basic Assumption Please ask permission of Pamela to reproduce her fine article by contacting her at pamhollister@thepeopleprocess.com |
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